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And the Beat goes on...

It is so time to do a new post. I am moving on from cancer treatment and continuing on with my heart treatment/maintenance. My blood pressure went back to normal after the chemo drugs flushed out. That is when the chest pain and all the fun symptoms with it came back. I was really needing a doctor to step in and help. My doctor in UT was nervous seeing what my blood pressure did during chemo and knowing that Nitro drops the BP even more. So we just continued on with cancer treatment.

During radiation the radiation technicians were so nice but couldn't help much while I lay alone in the radiation room with tears running down my face from pain. I could barely get in a good breath while I laid flat on my back. Moving would make the whole process worthless it was already planned out to give me the maximum benefit. I did finish radiation after a few weeks of hospital stay toward the end.

I was in bed for a few months after Radiation treatment ended. I had a heart attack in August because of stress and lack of IV Nitro to help me get out of the bad cycle of spasms I was caught in. Even with the heart attack I still did not receive the treatment I needed. Very frustrating. My doctor did figure out though that I was in heart failure. Something I knew from symptoms but not something he would write on my chart.

However, there is always a rainbow after the storm. Reminding you that going through the storm is worth it. One day in September I was tired of all the pain. I needed help, I wasn't eating or sleeping and I could barely dress myself. I was no good to my family and being depressed wouldn't help. So I called my dad and he picked me up to go to the hospital. Knowing the local hospital could not sustain the high level of IV Nitro and lets just say a gut feeling I decided to go to Idaho Falls' hospital. They have rejected this treatment and my disease a few dozen times so it was a shot in the dark. The doc on in the ER called in the cardiologist and this is one doc that I knew well as one that did not approve of the treatment. I'm not sure exactly what it was that made him change his mind but he accepted me as a patient.

I was taken to the cardiac ward and he told the nurses be cautious but to go as high as I needed on the IV Nitro. Getting access to do the infusions was the trickiest part of my whole stay. I ended up with two sticks, one in each foot. The nurses were stunned by my what dose of Nitro my body took in and the fact that it controlled all of my pain with no pain medications added. I was finally able to lay back flat on my back. I could breath while doing it too! I took a pic of me smiling on my back. Small victories.

After that infusion and release from the hospital I have been grocery shopping, gardening, walking, going to soccer with my son, getting the house ready for Halloween, house work, canning, day trips to the mountains and my favorite thing yesterday I went horse back riding in Harriman Park. It was about 9 miles with my dad and son. It was something I never thought I would do with him since it causes so much chest pain. I had no pain yesterday and just minimal pain over night and none today. I couldn't be happier. Not everyday is full of energy but since that Nitro treatment I would say 5 of my 7 days are just what I want them to be or more.

Here are two of the pictures that I treasure most over the last few days. Yesterday's ride in the park. And the coolest from today was the soccer team that my son plays on, The Blue Wreckers, surprised us today when we showed up to the game. My son has been wearing his thumbs red and wearing pink arm bands to support both breast cancer awareness month and heart disease. The surprise is that his whole team had pink arm bands and red thumbs. I had to choke back tears. Bradach was over the moon that his team would not just support him in supporting me but join in. It was a great symbol of how it takes a team to win battles. We need each other and we are all in it together. The boys won their game as well coming from behind. So it was awesome.

I can't wait to show the docs that one treatment can do so much for me. I am a fighter and won't give up but I do need a hand up once in a while. We all do. Be kind to each other and love each day. People might think I'm weird or over protective of my son for staying at his practices. The truth is...I trust the coaches, they know what they are doing and I trust Bradach. However I know and have seen how fragile life is and we aren't guaranteed anther day so soak up all that you can in the day you are given. I love to see my son run and play and interact. He knows I am there and care as's two ways.

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